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Post by NASH7777 on Jun 2, 2006 11:09:12 GMT -5
Okay here's my poem. I just decided to complete that example I made up
Dreams are kept often dark Dangerous Relics Entering And Meanings Secret Agnostic Reasons Endearing Kinds Exchanged Preposterously Together Oblivious Feelings Torn Endlessly Now Dreams Are Rendering Karma
~~~~~~~~~ Translation Our dreams are kept quite regularely hidden away from us The dangerous things we cherish come to us in our minds but the reason is unknown doubtful reasons give us our comfort (because there are no undoubtful ones) the kinds of doubtful reasons are mixed irrationally together the unmindful feelings are destroyed until they hardly exist But these dreams are effecting us and our future
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Post by NASH7777 on Jun 2, 2006 10:22:26 GMT -5
"Line 4: I think that "too much time did we invest" means "too much time did we invest [in other things]", that is, did we not spend enough time on expressing our love? Is this the right track?"
Maybe a few edits would help like
I think that "too much time did we invest in sordid matters" or something. ~~~~~ Anyways that's not the intent this post.
I should get ambitious and do some poetry. I usually try to either overly complicate my poetry or overly simplify. Like i try different patterns than you've ever come across like for example ~the last letter of the previous line must be the first letter of the next one ~the first word in each line becomes the beginning letters of each word in the next one like: Dreams are kept often dark Dangerous Relics Entering And Meanings Secret
(notice how the first letter of each word in the second line spells out "dreams" from the previous?)
The problem with overcomplicating the rules of your verse is that it sometimes gets hard to put your meaning into the piece. Then when I over simplify my verse it's never a powerful piece like:
Winter breeze on tops of trees no one around to see it
Thunder crash and rain went splash non one around to hear it ~~ Very imagistic yes, but afterwards it's like...well that was nice... I'll never read that again...
Haha
Poetry is often under rated, i personally enjoy a good book that I can analyze rather than poetry. But i spose if I want to write any more I better get my own poetry topic lol so *out*!
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Post by NASH7777 on Jun 1, 2006 23:04:29 GMT -5
Well I can't just criticise, I need to constructively criticise SO here's my advice on how to possibly change
You Have:
Do we in this day think the less with the emotions so closely knit to fellow human in with whom we sit As a society can we digress
I'ld change it to something like:
Do we in this day think the less. Being our emotions so closely knit. Knit to fellow humans with whom we sit. As a society can we digress?
~~~~
I think by not letting things run on so much it's easier for people to interpret it. It allows the reader to know when to put the idea together in there head and then move on to the next one.
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Post by NASH7777 on Jun 1, 2006 22:35:21 GMT -5
is there a reason why Do and As are the only two words with capitals?
I keep thinking of Brazen for Blazon, don't ask why. Here's what the dictionary said for it
1. Heraldry. A coat of arms. The description or representation of a coat of arms. An ostentatious display ~~~~~
Ok I critique now.
I like each line individually but how they flow and follow I don't at all. It seems like you you never really make your point in the stanza... let me reword that...umm maybe by example.
Do we in this day think the less
with the emotions so closely knit (ok it's fine with one extra line of running it on)
to fellow human in with whom we sit (now it falls apart...feels like a run on where the original line is never fully finished, it just runs into the next prep phrase or clause)
As a society can we digress
~~~~ Let's look at another
are books consumed and be we blessed to pervade society with mystic fit (okay with the one extra line thingy) when cupid's arrows target hit (starts to run on and lose meaning) to watch the burning of such nest (really lost here...yeah ouch)
In english we strive to make compound-complex sentences because they make us sound educated, and they can make more meaninglful, flowing sentences. However in poetry (especially since lines are split so often) the meaning can get lost and becomes confusing. It also seems to not FOCUS on an idea or theme, but run clause and phrase running into the next never truly getting a solid idea.
IDK just what I thought....now remember you can't get mad hahaha :-P
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Post by NASH7777 on May 16, 2006 13:31:25 GMT -5
Mac version anyone?
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Post by NASH7777 on May 10, 2006 15:47:08 GMT -5
Yeah I'm slightly disapointed too. Where's Zelda? lol But seriously RPGM1 was favored and the order didn't seem that well thought out. IMO of course...w-e
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Post by NASH7777 on May 13, 2006 7:25:54 GMT -5
"So far the one question that no one's answered (including me) is why does God put us through this if he already knows our fate in the afterlife (he knows and sees all)?"
Easy and I'm not overly religious. Be cause we are condemned. The day the apple was taken and eaten we become sinful and could not be in the presence of God. The punishment for sin is death and disease. But because God sent his holy son for our forgiveness, we have a chance for an eternal perfect life in heaven, if we accept his gift and follow him while we can on this life.
Of course that's only if you want to believe all that.
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Post by NASH7777 on May 10, 2006 15:40:14 GMT -5
I've often thought along the same lines of suicide and such Will. But IDK I'ld like to just die sometimes and be like w-e happens happens. I just wanna know what happens. If there's God I'll meet him, if there's nothing then time will go on forever and repeat. If not oh well what defines me as me anyway?
I've come to the conclusion that life is a bunch of BS anyways. So I'll live out my life as best as I can for now until it gets to be too much or I get myself in a situation where I really f'd up and want to escape from everything then kill myself. Plus i kinda fear a painful death and choosing my death would be so much better anywho.
But as far as us at Doan's are concerned don't do it. We like you and care about you. You still have much too offer and you can't be at your zero point yet although I've felt very close many times in my life.
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Post by NASH7777 on May 10, 2006 7:22:18 GMT -5
This topic is going two directions. A logical one and a emotional-life-feely one. I stick to the laws of physics never change and thus the organization they're in right now has to flow according to those laws which means we can't have choice. If you don't like it too bad. The only part that's too bad is if you get the idea that your fake choice isn't any good. Cause all you really have is it, so you have to go with it and live with using your logic to influence and not give up...it'll be much better that way. Otherwise you may lose purpose in life. What is the purpose of life, it's whatever you want it to be. It's all on an indiviual level.
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Post by NASH7777 on May 8, 2006 19:25:59 GMT -5
Of course we couldn't simulate it, as the only true way would be to recreate eveything exactly, which would be impossible. I meant in theory, like if I was an omnipotent god i could figure out it all. And the velocity of particles when you get down to strings and such are physical traits of the strings and not a property of them. The waves of the strings are the speed in a way. So you could look at how they were arranged and figure it out. And either way a few strings etc.. aren't going to matter to the entire atom and compound in our reaction we're concerned about.
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Post by NASH7777 on May 8, 2006 15:22:40 GMT -5
I'm just saying we don't have true choice. Just a wordly choice. Ourselves option to do different things based on past experiences, logic, and whatnot. That's our choice, but what I'm saying is that that's the extent of it. It's choice based on restraint and a system which makes it not true choice. Think about it. If I were to freeze the entire universe right now, we could take every molecule and atom and work backwards to find out what happened a second ago, or even a year ago by working backwards all the chemical equations and whatnot...which also means we could work forward. Forward into the future and see our (fake) choices and see outcome.
Pretty much everything needs a derivative or place that spwaned or created/influenced it. Since this is true everything is determined and producted by these derivatives. Cause and effect, based on the system. No true choice...only the ability to apply logic to situations to better the system.
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Post by NASH7777 on May 8, 2006 9:09:27 GMT -5
Okay religious people hit back button now...that would semi actually be me. But if your capable of not infering too much of it. read on.... ~~~~~~~
I have several strong ideas as to how the universe one is religion but I'm not going to go there too much right now. One I believe strongly is that we have no choice. It angrifies me when people say we have choice because it is not true choice. Everything follows the laws of physics, electrons spin around the proton(s) and nucleus based off laws and systems. We can not make a computer come up with random numbers, only statistically random numbers. I don't even think we can cme up with random numbers. Everything is based off or influences. It's like pick a color, you might say green because it is your favorite color, your looking at it, someone mentioned it earlier today, or whatnot, but it's always influenced. The laws of physics just can't change and allow choice for humans and not animals and other things either. We're nothing but the complex integration of chemicals reacting systematically with one another causing outcomes.
Also one comfort sorta thing is, since time goes on forever, eventually the pattern has to repeat. This is our infinite time doing this and we'll do it infinite times more. Of course these times are no where close... I mean like a billion lightyears to the power of a billion lightyears to the power of a billion lightyears or something. But the pattern will also repeat with variataions of course. Events that absolutely devastated you in your life may never occur. Deaths of friends, abuse, accidents, incidents, etc...
Which leads into my other theory of everything. Everything exists. Everything is nothing and nothing is everything. Every combination of every possible things exists. X,Y,Z,time, dimensions, dimensions of dimensions etc... goes on forever and has every possible outcome and structure. And we are just a part of everything.
Another thing I've thought about is what defines existence. There's this program that runs this pattern that creates little mini-life on this grid. It follows some simple laws. You can start it with whatever you want and hit play and the blocks will move around according to the laws. It's awesome as you see little ships made that travel around until they crash into something or little blobs that follow a pattern. What if the grid was infinitely times greater. Couldn't it get complex enough to form systems that have life? Or atleast it's own semiform of life. Would this not be alive? It's a little like the matrix. Maybe we are just a complex computer program running from a much more complex universe? Then in theory if I create a few laws to a system and solve maybe a 1000 frames of it, it isn't yet complex to create life but lets say it does if you continue the pattern. In theory doesn't the pattern repeat. That life exists even if the system isn't ran. It's an idea...but it creates a world of life, they have feeling and etc... bound by the laws that created their world...but they exist.
Yet another theory I have is the eternal size theory. This is that inside you there are organs and tissue and cells and cell organelles and organic molecules and atoms and electrons and strings and quarks. We'll I believe in this theory that after you get that small eventually inside like quarks or a few units even smaller exist gallaxies and inside gallaxies, solar systems, and planets, and the rare one with living organisms and organs and cells and atoms and etc... forever. Of course this also means that we are a human on a planet in a solar system, in a galaxy, in a....etc... eventually in a quark/string/electron,nuetron proton,etc....
The system seems like a such a patterned and complete one that I like it a lot. And it makes perfect sense for time and everything. Right now billions to the billionth power to the billionth power of eons go by to our atom's universe in one second of our relative time. It's there galaxies that move and etc... to create greater chemical reactions to create ours. And our galaxies move and are possibly part of another living organism or maybe just a piece of star dust who knows....
~~~~~ Yeah there's quite a bit of in depth thought so if ya don't quite understand something, don't feel bad cause I probably just explained it poorly.
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Post by NASH7777 on Apr 30, 2006 20:24:05 GMT -5
Yeah i got both discs for 19.95. Anyone else pick up there copy?
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Post by NASH7777 on Mar 23, 2006 22:05:23 GMT -5
Dude that's soooooo awesome. I'm excited. I may have to get a DS just for that game seriously!
Nintendo is so inginuitive with everything.
Being able to draw out your boomerang's path!!! That's sooooo coool.
Or being able to write info down on your map for later use! Plus partially 3d yet 2d at other times. SOOOOOOO AWESOME!!!! I want now....
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Post by NASH7777 on Mar 23, 2006 8:09:20 GMT -5
Yeah I check here multiple times everyday.
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Post by NASH7777 on Oct 6, 2007 0:08:17 GMT -5
Yup
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Post by NASH7777 on Sept 11, 2007 23:38:09 GMT -5
Pretty sweet but can I see a normal one haha.
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Post by NASH7777 on Jun 18, 2007 17:49:12 GMT -5
Had to lose the goatee for work :-( Got my hair colored Got my cartilage peirced
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Post by NASH7777 on May 24, 2007 16:24:02 GMT -5
Me a few years ago Valedictorian and salutatorian right here baby! Jhon in Plane ND from the sky Welcome for our Grad. Jhon and I. And when ya leave.
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Post by NASH7777 on Apr 22, 2007 22:21:06 GMT -5
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Post by NASH7777 on Apr 21, 2007 19:14:42 GMT -5
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Post by NASH7777 on Dec 26, 2006 11:35:09 GMT -5
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Post by NASH7777 on Oct 12, 2006 15:52:45 GMT -5
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Post by NASH7777 on Mar 10, 2006 22:08:49 GMT -5
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Post by NASH7777 on Feb 28, 2006 8:37:21 GMT -5
"she completely messes with my hours, never answers her work phone for anything, she doesn't even care, with everything else going on in my life, work doesn't even help me get away"
Welcome to my world. I already walked out at work once...then they begged me to come back. I fortunately live in a small town where good work is hard to come by. But I'm not so sure how much longer I will stay there. It's just that being a small town, there's not many other job options. I guess there's this one lady at work that is the reason why everyone else left in the past couple years. And everyone has told the managers, but she's best friends with the manager. Then the manager of all the stores has been told but nothing gets done. And I've talked individually to the manager on multiple occasions. Nothing much gets fixed, it's very frustrating.
Sorry to rant in your topic, just I've been there. Good luck with whatever works out.
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