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Post by The Final Rune on Apr 12, 2005 13:25:21 GMT -5
The Speeding Ticket _________________________
A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license.
She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together.
Yesterday you took my license away and today you expect me to show it to you?"
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Post by The Final Rune on Apr 12, 2005 13:40:38 GMT -5
One Liners _________________________
Early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.
Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
If you choke a smurf, what color does it turn? (no offense)
How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?
I tried sniffing Coke once, but the ice cubes got stuck in my nose.
If you can't read this, you're illiterate.
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Post by The Final Rune on Apr 12, 2005 13:42:56 GMT -5
Can This Be True? _________________________
Police in Oakland, California spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing ten tear gas canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing beside them in the police line, shouting, "Please come out and give yourself up."
Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery suspect who just couldn't control himself during a line-up. When detectives asked each man in the line-up to repeat the words: "Give me all your money or I'll shoot," the man shouted, "That's not what I said!"
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Post by Dark Knight Of Lodis on Apr 12, 2005 13:49:07 GMT -5
Those last two stories with the police are funny because they are true. Shows you how stupid some people really are. Although, the first one was pretty creative.
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Post by The Smurf on Apr 12, 2005 14:24:51 GMT -5
"If you choke a smurf, what color does it turn?" that's just not cool. -the dark smurf
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Post by The Final Rune on Apr 12, 2005 16:34:40 GMT -5
Cheesy _________________________
A burger walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't serve food here."
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Post by The Smurf on Apr 12, 2005 16:38:50 GMT -5
...
-the smurf
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Post by NASH7777 on Apr 12, 2005 16:47:05 GMT -5
...
-the smurf
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Post by The Smurf on Apr 12, 2005 16:52:20 GMT -5
it appears we have a doppelganger...my mushroom demons will take care of this foolishness edit: you forgot my signature! ha! -the REAL demon death smurf
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Post by NASH7777 on Apr 12, 2005 16:54:56 GMT -5
HAhahaa not now....
-the TRUE demon death smurf
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Post by The Smurf on Apr 12, 2005 16:57:42 GMT -5
you have too many icons and posts, doppelganger!
-the demon smurf
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Post by NASH7777 on Apr 12, 2005 16:59:05 GMT -5
And thus makes me the better smurf!
-the demon smurf
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Post by The Smurf on Apr 12, 2005 17:03:17 GMT -5
prepare to feel the wrath of my pet demonic soul eater! -the demon smurf
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Post by The Final Rune on Apr 12, 2005 17:12:17 GMT -5
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Post by NASH7777 on Apr 12, 2005 17:15:53 GMT -5
I'm sparticus! No I'm sparticus! No I'm sparticus!!! No I'm sparticus! No I'm sparticus!!! No I'm sparticus!!
lol
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Post by The Final Rune on Apr 12, 2005 17:38:18 GMT -5
IS THE
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Post by The Smurf on Apr 12, 2005 18:06:46 GMT -5
pepsi vanilla all the way!
-Lord Genesis (aka the evil demonic smurf)
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Post by NASH7777 on Apr 12, 2005 18:09:32 GMT -5
I'm going Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper on this one :-)
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Post by Dark Knight Of Lodis on Apr 12, 2005 21:14:54 GMT -5
I used to like soda...then the Marines beat it out of me.
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Post by Neo Samurai on Apr 12, 2005 21:39:47 GMT -5
I have soda every now and then, but not much. Need to stay in shape to impress the hunnies.
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Post by Dark Knight Of Lodis on Apr 12, 2005 21:51:00 GMT -5
Can't you just mind control the men you're after? Or are you a demon who doesn't know how?
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Post by Neo Samurai on Apr 12, 2005 21:54:33 GMT -5
Men?! I'm a straight guy! I'm talking about women!
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Post by Dark Knight Of Lodis on Apr 12, 2005 22:09:56 GMT -5
I would never have guessed. ;D
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Post by Neo Samurai on Apr 12, 2005 22:11:59 GMT -5
For that, I will be anything but merciful in our battle.
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Post by The Smurf on Apr 13, 2005 14:03:03 GMT -5
not like we were going to be merciful in the first place... my pet demonic soul eater hasn't had a meal in a long long time... -Lord Genesis
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